Happy Self-Love Sunday!

I hope this past week has been amazing for you. And if you felt this week wasn’t all that, then I hope you make this upcoming week better! I hope you all enjoyed A Word Wednesday. I am so excited to share this journey with you all. If you weren’t able to check it out, reference my last post or visit my Instagram (@unveilingjannaalane). I have so much content prepared, and I hope that it will positively impact you all the way I know it’s going to impact me. So now you all have two reasons to visit my blog each week, what a joy (right?)! Anyways, today’s topic came to me late last night. It hit me so hard that I would not be doing myself or you all justice if I don’t share. So happy self-love Sunday & I hope you all enjoy! 

How do we heal from hurt? It is such a relevant question. But also, a question I feel we will be asking ourselves and others until the end of time. Hurt can appear in numerous forms and in numerous periods of our life. Each hurt will look and feel different. Therefore, how we overcome each situation will be different as well. I wish there was a magic book that discussed every form of hurt and how to overcome it, that would be perfect. But we don’t live in a perfect world and that is NOT realistic. Even though there’s no one solution fixes all, you can change your mindset in relation to how you view hurt. And even though this won’t completely cause healing immediately, it’s a step. One step in moving forward and healing is better than no steps at all.

Merriam-Webster defines hurt in various ways. Some of the definitions are: to inflict with physical pain; to do substantial or material harm; to cause emotional pain or anguish to; to be detrimental to; and the list continues.

Sometimes emotional pain can sting and cause damage just as much as physical pain can. Throughout my life, I’ve been hurt so many times by so many different people in so many different ways. Physically, mentally and emotionally. I’ve been hurt by family members, friends, former friends and significant others. And I wish I could say the hurt got easier to deal with as I got older, but that wouldn’t be true. This isn’t true because each circumstance was different. And no matter how cruel this world can be, my heart is what it is. I care for people and love hard, and though this has its ups and downs, I can not and will never change that. Therefore, I’m still learning to heal from my hurt each and every day and this starts by changing my mindset.

Often times we try to write our hurt off immediately and keep things moving like we’re A okay. We don’t allow ourselves to feel the hurt and heal from this emotion. I’ve been guilty of this myself. At some points in my life, my hurt has had me questioning if it was valid. I questioned if I had the right to hurt and feel the way that I did. So, I tried to keep living like I did before the hurt occurred. Essentially, I tried to ignore it. However, in the late hours of the night, when I was alone, or when I really started to think, of course hurt crept its little way into my life. I didn’t realize that I needed to accept and process the hurt in order to heal. But I did, and I still do, and so do you.  I’ve learned that processing my hurt can also provide revelation in my life.  These revelations can lead to healing. You can’t heal from hurt by just writing it off, that only allows it to manifest and cause more damage than good.

Alexandra Elle said it best on Instagram the other day, she literally said it so perfectly that I couldn’t say it any better (picture above). You can be positive and still have bad days! Meaning you can be positive and happy but still be dealing with hurt. She also said that you don’t have to pretend or be perfect. Honestly, I think that is what keeps us from healing from our hurt. We feel we have to pretend everything is good EVERY second of the day or that we are perfect. We don’t have to pretend or be perfect, I repeat, we do not. This is what hinders our healing. We can have a good moment with friends or loved ones, but still be suffering from hurt and pain. But we MUST acknowledge and feel our feelings. This won’t be the best feeling in the world; however, it is SO necessary to healing and growth.

Today, I challenge you to change your mindset in regard to your hurt. Don’t let the things that hurt you in the past control your future. Reflect, acknowledge what happened and also acknowledge how you grew and overcame from it. And if you’re still healing, acknowledge that too! Take some time to yourself to allow yourself to feel. Don’t hold it all in or stuff it in one place. I promise in the grand scheme of things, you’ll be happy you allowed yourself time to feel and begin your healing process. Remember, this isn’t the one and only way to heal from hurt, but it’s a start!