Who I Am, Who You Are

Happy Wednesday my lovely readers!
As many of you know, I started school last Monday. So I apologize for last week being blogless. I had to get my life together for school. But I’m back ! Today’s blog is heavily inspired by some feelings that have been heavy on my heart to share. But, I definitely feel this topic is relatable to all. Because I can guarantee that we have all felt this way at one point in time.
And who doesn’t love a self-love Sunday post on a Wednesday? (Especially because of my absence)

It kills me when people think they know who I am, because people only know what they see or what they assume to be true. I am pretty guarded with my life, so I don’t always share every personal matter, opinion, or detail. But at the same time, it’s not hard for others to assume that they know who I am based off of preconceived notions. They say they don’t “fw” me, but for what? Or only talk to me when it’s convenient for them. But if I’m not smiling, like I normally do, or quick to greet them, then I’m the problem. They assume I have an attitude or feel some way. But, everyone has bad days. No one can keep a genuine smile 24/7 and who are you to fault me, because I’m only human?

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Who I am shouldn’t be defined by who you believe I am. Who you are shouldn’t be defined by the words of others. I am human, too. I bleed and hurt, just like you. I’ve just become accustomed with keeping a smile for others & making sure they’re okay. But sometimes, I have to take time for myself to ensure that I’m okay. That’s the stage I am currently in right now. It’s sort of weird, confusing, and frustrating all at the same time. But no matter what I endure or how I feel, I have to remember that those things will never change the person that I am. And you have to remember that when you are feeling the same, this holds true to you too.

I have been bullied, so much so that it affected the way I viewed myself ten years down the line. I questioned who I was for years. I compared myself to others and felt all of my insecurities and shortcomings way more than I should have. These situations and feelings have led me to the question, Who Am I? And it took me a while to learn that, who I am is not defined by who you think I am. It’s not defined by how you feel about me or the issues you have with me. Who I am is left to be determined by me. I am not perfect, but who is? And most importantly, who will ever be?

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I have always been judged for being myself. Thing is, everyone won’t accept you. Nor like you. Some may have reasons, most may not. Simply because you’re you & they don’t get you. But don’t let that stop you from being you. I stopped myself for so long, scared of what others would think.  But, hey who cares? Literally you can and will drive yourself crazy trying to please every one else. And I will never change, who I am, because it’s not appealing to the public eye. I’m writing this because I think someone needed to read this, I am not sure who. But I am hoping my vulnerability will help you, in whatever way it can. Know that you are special because you are you.

I challenge you all to stop focusing on how people see you, but how you see yourself! The only person who has to love you is YOU. It may not be easy and it’s definitely a process, but begin loving who you are today. All the little details of your life are included in the story of you. They have aided you in becoming the person you are today. My journey with bullying, confidence, and self-esteem have shaped me into the woman who I am continuously growing into today. Those past pains aren’t who I am, but they have been associated with my development & growth. Self-love is definitely the best love. Never change & always remember who you are, as I continue to remember, who I am.

Love J.A.