Happy Self-Love Sunday!

I hope everyone has had a wonderful weekend. And I hope that your upcoming week is even better. I am just getting out of church and the message & pastor really touched me! So hey, why not share the message with you all and my interpretation? I hope this touches you all the way it touched me.

So it’s my senior year in college. Which has been very stressful, for a number of reasons. I am pretty involved, on and off campus, so my days are pretty busy. And then on top of that, I am taking two of the hardest (and my last two major related classes) Information Security classes, which have been BEYOND stressful. Sometimes, I can get overwhelmed with all I do and with all I have to do. I try not to complain because Lord knows I love being busy, but sometimes it can be too much. Especially since I LOVE making A’s, and making A’s requires hard work, time, and dedication. But, I am also committed to my mentoring programs, organizations, and all my other areas of interest. And then add personal feelings & emotions into that mix, that can be a lot!

I gave you all that background to say, there have been moments where I didn’t have anything left in me, any fight, any drive, any energy. But, today at church my pastor said, “BUT my blessings are still holding me up.” See, I may feel overwhelmed at times and I may cry sometimes and feel like throwing the towel, but I can’t and never do. And the only reason for this is because of my God. He blesses me, even when I don’t realize it. And it is because of his very blessings that I am able to continue on, to continue being busy, and accomplish every thing that I have set to accomplish.

Everyone has been singing the song, “I’m living my best life.” But who is living their blessed life? That’s why when the pastor brought today’s message of “Living the Blessed Life,” I felt it on so many levels. It touched all of my spirit, heart, and soul and that’s why it resonated so heavy with me and inspired today’s blog. And one of the points he made is that, we, as humans, are so quick to seek “counsel from the unGodly” and then wonder why our situations seem endless. That really hit me, too. Because everyone wants to live a blessed and happy life and in times of need, we are so quick to run to our friends for advice (which I have mentioned in a previous post). And there’s nothing wrong with leaning on friends in time of need. But, why can’t we run to God first? If we truly want to live a blessed life, why can’t we seek God first and follow his instructions and turn to our friends for support? You can’t live a blessed life seeking advice from people who AREN’T even living their blessed life.

One of my favorite things about God (I have so many) is that he blesses everyone. He blesses us regardless of what we look like, what we believe, how we treat others, and how we live our lives. However, it’s up to us to accept these blessings. We can’t accept them doing the bare minimum and living like everyone else does. We have to be exceptional, we have to understand that we are flawed but our flaws make us who we are, that we are beautiful no matter what anyone says, and most importantly, that we have to seek God’s guidance. Being blessed doesn’t mean that you are free from problems, pain, and worry. It means that YOU are blessed IN SPITE of those very persecutions and no matter how hard they try, they will never take away your blessings. I don’t know about you, but I want to live my blessed life.

Another thing that my pastor said is that, “I have to live my blessed life so that I can live my best life.” And everyone’s singing they are living their best life, so why not live your blessed life, too? I am guilty of not realizing how blessed I truly am at times. But today,  I see each and every blessing & I am so thankful. I am thankful I don’t look like how I feel sometimes, I am thankful that I don’t look like what I’ve been through, and for so much more. Think about all the things you have to be thankful for, even though things may not be going your way. I promise in the end, everything will all work out.  Today, I challenge you to replace the word best with blessed when you talk about your life. Because when you are blessed, you can live your best life.

Hello lovelies & Happy Self-Love Sunday!
I hope this past week has been fantastic for you & that this upcoming week will be even better. I just want to give you all a quick little update on my week & life before we dive into this blog 🙂 So this past week happened to be midterm week for me, as well homecoming week! I was beyond ready for the week to be here, but it seemed as if it came so fast and ended even faster. And what made it bittersweet was that this was my last homecoming as an undergraduate student. So I was beyond busy with school and homecoming festivities, but I am also beyond happy to be writing this for you all today.

Today’s topic kind of appeared to me throughout the week when I was thinking about my feelings and it’s been so heavy on my heart that I had to share. I have a tendency of taking some situations, words, and others things too personally OR just personal in general. And I know for sure that I am not the only person who experiences these moments where things just get to them.

It can be hard to take and leave things for what they are. And it can be easy to automatically take things to heart. But this week I saw this quote that really inspired this post (which is displayed above). It’s not always about me OR you. Sometimes things just happen or people just say things. And it just is what it is. It’s not personal, but it occurred. You have to let it go and move forward. And I have been taking some situations personally lately. They’ve been bothering me, hurting my heart & killing my spirit. But as I analyzed these situations after reading that Tweet, I realize that these situations aren’t as personal as I’ve been taking them.

Sometimes people just lie, some people are just rude, some people will hurt you (unintentionally & intentionally), and do a plethora of other things that we may probably never understand. But that’s a them problem and not a you problem. You can’t control how people behave and you definitely can’t control how they will behave in regards to you. Some people may be a work in progress, just like me, and just like some of you. I am not justifying behavior, but just exploring possible causes for people and how these actions can cause people to take things personally. The only certain thing you can control is how you react and whether or not you take what they do to heart, whether you take it personally.

We are only human and therefore, we feel, act, and react as human beings. I know that my feelings can get hurt easily. And sometimes, I allow my feelings to block and cloud my judgment. I began to take things personally and act accordingly, in my mind. But that is not okay. Every thing is not a direct attack to or on me. I am working on moving forward and letting go. It’s not easy, but it’s doable.

I am writing all of this to say, everything isn’t a direct attack on you either. Don’t take everything personal. When people speak on who you are, how you behave, judge you, and more don’t take it personal! You know you better than anyone else. You know your heart & they are only speaking based off of assumptions. So let them assume and you keep doing you.It MAY feel personal, but who cares? Life goes on and so should you. You are special, valuable and worthy. You are worth being loved, especially by yourself! So I challenge you to join me, as I work on not taking things personal & embracing what I know to be true about myself. Keep in mind to never take it personal and keep being the wonderful, majestic, worthy of love you that you are!

 

Hello my lovely readers & Happy Self-Love Sunday!
I know it has been a while. I could list a million different reasons for my hiatus, but A LOT has been going on with me (which is no excuse). Like down in the dumps, needing some uplifting & motivation. So even in the midst of my busyness, I’ve been wanting to write, possibly could’ve wrote something if I made myself, however, my spirit wasn’t in it. And I don’t just want to write just to have something out there, my blogs mean a lot to me & I want them to be able to impact you all. But I am very thankful for this spirit of rejuvenation that the Lord has sent me. So I am most definitely back and better.

September is coming to a close and tomorrow marks the beginning of my favorite month, which also happens to be my birthday month, October. Therefore, I want to leave some burdens and bothers in September. I want October to be filled with lots of love, prosperity, and memorable times. And in order for me to let these burdens go, I have to be real, express how I feel, and let go of the feelings, and most importantly the things, I can not control. I must be able to withstand and/or recover quickly, I must be resilient.

Mentally, I have been so drained. Drained dealing with the constant thoughts and emotions running through my head. Thoughts of what if scenarios and situations I wish I could go back and change or thoughts of how I want things to currently go. But recently, I have been reminded to practice what I preach. And whenever I give advice to my friends, I tell them that I believe things happen for a reason. I believe that GOD orchestrates things to occur in our life for a reason, down to every little detail. So how can I reassure others that things happen for a reason, yet worry myself? Things won’t always end the way that I want them to and nothing is ever truly perfect. So, I am currently and actively practicing what I preach. I’m embracing the serenity prayer and knowing that God will provide. Knowing that the destination I have set my eyes on may not align with God’s destination for me and that what’s meant for me, will be for me. Minor setbacks for major comebacks.

It hurts to not be okay or feel like you’re living to your full potential. But you can’t have a rainbow without a little rain. Nobody is perfect and no one’s life is either. There will be low moments and there will be good times. We have to choose not to let these bad moments dictate our life or our potential. We must look at these moments as stepping-stones toward the bigger picture. We must see that we can’t be happy every moment of every single day. And that it’s okay to embrace our feelings. It’s okay to share how we feel, to let go of what we need to and keep pushing. Because how can you have a major comeback if you’ve never had a setback? And honestly, please introduce me to a person who has never struggled or had a setback in their life. Trust, I know how easy it can be to want to give up and throw the towel in BUT we are all conquerors and the joy that will be revealed to us once we overcome and endure is worth while.

Some people believe that in order for people to adequately love themselves or participate in self-love, that their lives or the lives of others must be exemplary and perfect. And I promise you, that is not the case. I believe that in those moments when we feel the lowest, those moments where we struggle and desperately seek guidance & peace, that we are able to truly appreciate who we are. Like I said, I have been drained and I have been doubting myself in every manner possible. However, I have also been able to appreciate who I am and the woman that I am becoming. I am not perfect, far from it actually. I have flaws and I have places where I need to improve. But I love the heart God blessed me with, I love my caring nature, I love my passion for writing, and so on. And if I hadn’t been so down and questioning myself, I wouldn’t have truly evaluated myself and recognized all the things I love about myself. It’s possible to love yourself even when you’re not 100% feeling like yourself, because then you’re able to see why you love who you are & appreciate yourself more.

Self-love is a journey, just like participating in a race. Some people like to rush to the finish line, while others like to take their time and are happy because they made it to the end, no matter how long it took. But see with races there will be setbacks. Some unforeseen obstacles can appear and throw you completely off track. But these obstacles don’t have to stop your journey, they shouldn’t stop your journey. Obstacles should make you reevaluate ways to conqueror them and whatever else may come your way. They should motivate you to keep going. Because after the setback is always a comeback. And I am currently conquering obstacles & coming back.

Happy Self-Love Sunday my lovely readers!

Happy September! I hope that this month is filled with blessings, prosperity, and lots of wonderful experiences. September is a month dedicated to many topics such as: self-awareness, self-improvement and one of my favorite self-care. So in honor of September and our weekly self-love Sunday’s, today’s topic is dedicated to self-care.

The English Oxford Dictionary defines self-care as “the practice of taking an active role in protecting one’s own well-being and happiness, in particular during periods of stress.” But how many of us actively participate in self-care? Actively means that we are taking care of ourselves even when we aren’t experiencing stress or some extreme situation. We may think that we do, but we don’t. We only address self-care when we are reminded that it’s important. I am guilty of this as well. However, I feel it’s important to discuss self-care, why it’s important & why we should all work to actively participate in self-care at all times.

I’ve previously discussed self-care, but never dedicated a full blog to it. And I was very inspired by all of the current events of the world, my personal experiences & self-love, so I figured why not discuss it. A majority of individuals would state that they take care of themselves daily. Most people participate in the basics of self-care such: going through a morning hygiene routine, eating throughout the day, and ending the night with well-needed rest. So, yes I believe participate in actions of caring for their physical self. But those few things listed above aren’t the only to care for yourself. Are you caring for your mental, spiritual, and emotional well-being every day, too?

Many factors are involved in the true act of self-care. Yes, taking care of our physical attributes is important, but so is caring for the other parts of ourselves, especially those that feel & hurt. Sometimes as humans we box up emotions and displace them, not realizing that as we continuously do this our emotions pile up and more than likely can lead to a breakdown or something worse. Therefore, just as you spend time washing your face and feeding your body with physical food, you must also ensure that you spend time on your spiritual, mental, and emotional self by mediating, reading, praying, or whatever works best for you to ensure your well-being. This can also look like removing some sort of negativity or hurt out of your life or even changing your behavior for the greater good that will follow. It’s one thing to think or even say that you take of yourself, but it’s another thing to actively do so. And I want us all to take care of ourselves, because we are all important!

Personally, I love to help others and I can get so caught up that I don’t always take care of my emotional, spiritual, or mental life. I need to work on actively ensuring that I am taking care of myself. Because sometimes I deal with battles that I don’t even speak on. I bury them in order to help others and can become overwhelmed and frustrated. But the same care I give to others, I must make sure to give to myself. And this goes for you all too. It’s okay to be that rock for your friends or others, but just make sure that you are being that same rock for yourself. And if you need some time for you, take it! Do not feel guilty or less than, because self-care is NOT selfish. Like I previously stated, we are all important. And sometimes the best person to realize your importance is you, that way you’ll be purposeful with your acts and intentions of self-care!

On this Self-Love Sunday, I challenge you all to actively participate in self-care. We can start during this month of September and continue on throughout the rest of the year, to next year, and the years to follow. Below are some nice infographics about ways to self-care. And if you feel you are taking care of yourself, but it’s not enough, PLEASE feel free to reach out to me & I will offer any guidance that I can. We all need to be on this journey of self-care. So just make sure you are ever so often consciously asking, am I actively caring for myself?

Happy Self-Love Sunday!

Last Self-Love Sunday, I attended the Beyoncé concert so I apologize for my absence. That was my first time ever attending a Beyoncé concert & it was truly an experience. But Self-Love Sunday blogs are FINALLY back in business. And I have some fire content coming your way these upcoming weeks. So stay tuned!

Sometimes, it seems as if the whole world is against us. As if we have no one on our side looking out for us. So why add fuel to that fire? Why be against yourself? People will quit on you, they will lose belief in you and what you’re capable of.  But just because they do does not mean that you have to or should. No matter what you’re going through, how hard it may seem, never quit on yourself.

I was on Instagram one day last week and came across the picture above. And it resonated with me so much that I decided to blog about it. This picture served as an unexpected inspiration for me. And I know that I can personally relate to this photo. So I am sure others can too, and I am hoping that this blog will be as meaningful to you all as this picture was to me.

Sometimes when things in our lives seem to be falling apart, it seems as if everything falls apart as well. And more than anything, it seems as if we lose support from people, as if they quit on us. And we experience these feelings, because people do quit. Everyone isn’t meant to be in your life for the long haul. Everyone can not handle the heat, so they “get out of the kitchen,” while they can. I’d be lying if I said these type of situations didn’t hurt. It hurts because just seeing others give up on you can make you want to give up on yourself. It can make you lose all motivation and honestly, question yourself, your path, and your impact. I’ve had quite a few people quit on me in my life. And I’ve quit on a few people myself. They always have their reasons and so have I. And as a result of people quitting on me, I quit on myself too. I lost my motivation & encouragement, especially since I lost support from others. But sadly, it took this picture for me to realize all of this.

Life wasn’t meant to be filled with butterflies & rainbows, there will be hardships. But one of the biggest hardships you can control is being team you. Some people will not support you simply because of who you are. Some people won’t like you for no go reason. And some people will have issues with you because they don’t like you or care for you. So why add yourself to one of these categories above? You have no reason not to support yourself, not like yourself, or have issues with yourself unless you are causing yourself harm in any manner. Wake up each day and make a conscious choice to believe in you & support you.

Honestly, I have given up on myself at times. Due to my circumstances, I began to question myself in the manner in which I described above. Since I lost the support of people, in a manner I stopped supporting myself, I temporarily quit on myself. But I vow to never quit on myself again. Each day I want to support myself, because so many people already won’t support me. I want to remain motivated, dedicated & focused on being the best me that I can. And that means showing my unconditional support for myself. Do you feel the same?

Today, I challenge & encourage you to be team you! Never quit on yourself, no matter what high expectations you have for yourself. Don’t treat yourself how others treat you. Treat yourself the way that you know you deserve to be treated. You are worthy, you are valuable & more than anything, you deserve to never be quitted on! As you go about your week, keep these things in mind: be team you and never quit on yourself!

Happy Self-Love Sunday & welcome to the month of August!

I hope this month is filled with favor & prosperity for you all. I pray that for all you students, like myself, that this school year is filled with all A’s and memorable experiences! Honestly, I hope you make the best of this new month and all the opportunities that will be presented before you. I am praying that August will be a month filled with rejuvenation for myself, so that my light shall reignite and shine bright.

Matthew 5:14 says, “Let your light shine before men in such a way that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father who is in heaven.” The Bible says that we should let our lights shine in order to reflect God working in our lives. And I can’t lie, recently I have felt my light dim. I’ve been unexplainably sad. I try to push through the day and end up in tears. And I’m trying to find and do everything to make myself happy.
As I sit in the car with my parents and my brother on vacation, riding down the back roads of St. John’s island in Charleston, I realize that this is the first time I’ve been genuinely happy in a while. Where I’m not putting on a smile to make others feel comfortable or make them think I’m good. I’m just being me and for those who know me, know that I love to be surrounded/immersed in my family and their love. I’m making jokes and picking at my dad and watching as my entire family erupts in laughter. And I realize that my sadness was dimming my light.

I’ve let the darkness of my emotions take over, so much so that my light wasn’t shining anymore.  I get that stars shine in darkness, but I was letting the darkness consume the light of my stars. I wasn’t allowing God’s works to be reflected in my life. I’ve been focused on my sadness, as if it’s the only thing going on in my life. As if my life revolves around it, as if I couldn’t function or go on. But getting away from my world and being able to sit and reflect has proved to be very thought-provoking and eye-opening. I may be hurt but I don’t have to allow my hurt to dictate my life. I still have the same purpose that I had before, just a little sadness. And I have to remember that my pain is temporary & I will be okay. This darkness had to occur in order for me to evaluate myself and understand that I am a conqueror who will shine through the darkness. And I can’t sit still to wallow in sadness, because what good does that do? But, I also have to remember to be patient with myself and my progress. And more importantly, patient with God’s timing for my life.

I was trying to force happiness, force the mending of my heart. But that stuff takes time. And regardless of who says or thinks what, it will all happen in the time that God has allotted it to for me and my life. It feels good to feel happy with my family, even though my worries and cares are in the back of my mind. They don’t seem so big anymore , they don’t seem so overwhelming, I find comfort in knowing that I have people who love me and look forward to seeing me or laughing at jokes I make. They have rekindled my light.

I want to shine bright. I want to continue pursuing my passions and dreams. And since this month has begun, a lot of divine intervention has occurred in my life that have reassured me of my recovery via the word of God, whether it be through my daily devotionals, readings of the Bible, or talks with God. It seems as if every thing is encouraging me to rekindle my light and carry on, to persevere and shine bright. See, my problem is feeling like I have to always be okay. And I don’t. So this sadness really hit me and I’ve been sad! But, this sadness has also served as an outlet for creative thoughts and ideas. And I know that with the help of God, I can continue on because he will give me peace beyond my understanding and restore me more than I ever expected. But, what kind of Self-Love Sunday would this be if I wasn’t real with you all on my current emotions, experiences? I will overcome and I am still loving myself. I hope to shine bright, it’ll just happen in due time. It’s a journey and I am a work in progress.

This Self-Love Sunday, I encourage you to shine brightly. This doesn’t mean I’m telling you be happy 24/7, that is not realistic. What I am saying is, take time to embrace your sadness and let those emotions pass. You don’t have to be happy all the time. And your sadness may affect you positively and inspire you with some content or an idea to help others by sharing your story. You are not alone & I promise you aren’t the only one going through something. WE ALL DO! So I am hoping that my sharing will touch someone today. Because being able to love yourself even when you’re not feeling your best is all included in self-love. But it’s your choice to let sadness take over your life or continue push through. I’m choosing to push through and shine bright. The choice is yours, what will you choose today?

Happy self-love Sunday!

I have been so excited to write this blog. It’s pretty personal & has been really heavy on my heart since last Sunday. I’m really hoping that it will touch you all. And more than anything, I am hoping that it will encourage you to embrace those parts of ourselves that we don’t want others to know about, the parts where we feel we are lacking. But honestly, if you never share then you never know who else can relate to you or how you can. So I am being brave today and sharing.

Insecurities can make you feel less than, worth less and like you have no purpose. These feelings generated by insecurities can make you feel like you have to be someone else because others may appear happier than you. But you never know what others are going through & everything isn’t always as it seems. Just because someone may seem happy doesn’t mean that they truly are. I believe everyone has insecurities, even if they won’t admit to them, they are still there. And I am learning that it is so important to acknowledge your insecurities so you won’t let them have victory over you. Today, I am choosing victory over my insecurities, I am choosing to overcome them.

Honestly, I think one of the most painful emotional hardships a female (or honestly anyone) can endure is dealing with insecurities, especially overcoming those insecurities. I can personally attest that I have struggled with this and continue to struggle. But I think one of the most important aspects to overcome insecurities is to acknowledge them. Half of the battle is acknowledging our insecurities because honestly, who wants to think about their insecurities? We bury them so we don’t have to think about them and sometimes, we don’t even realize the things that bother us are insecurities.

These past couple of weeks I am have been doing a lot of soul-searching & self-reflection. I’m trying to live my best life by being my best self. And in this process, I have learned a lot about myself. One thing being that I have aspects about myself and how I handle situations that bother me and not until recently, I didn’t realize how these things related to insecurities of mine. I don’t want to pretend I am perfect, because I am so far from that. But I do know that I try to be strong for others, even though I have things bothering me and eating at my soul. And these insecurities are one of those things. I was bullied when I was younger and those insults still resonate with me to this day and have resulted in the manifestation of some insecurities. I have felt less than more than once along with a million other ways. But I also know that my insecurities are what make me human. And that I can overcome them and not let them have victory over my life.

These insecurities have bothered me in ways that I didn’t truly understand until now. I had to be real with myself and be real about what I felt insecure about. I’ve been talking to God about them and declaring my victory over them. Because I refuse to let insecurities control my life, like I have in the past. Even though I have insecurities and I can recognize this, they don’t define who I am. See, I am who I am in spite of my insecurities. They’re like voices in my head telling me what I can’t do, who I can’t be. But these insecurities have also served as motivation, allowing me to realize that I can turn every can’t into something I can and that those insecurities won’t have the final say about who I am and who I will grow into. We all fall short and we all feel insecure sometimes. However, we are NOT our shortcomings. They are just a part of our story and they deserve to be shared, not locked inside, so we can better ourselves and others. So today I am sharing.

I am writing this for the person who feels they are all alone. As if they are the only one dealing with insecurities. I am writing this for the person who has had their insecurities thrown in their face. I am writing this for the person who feels less than. I am writing this for everyone, because we all can relate. And I am writing this for me. Because I can’t keep my story locked inside & expect to help others. I refuse to let my insecurities hold me back anymore. Today, I challenge you to think about your insecurities (and yes I know this isn’t the most comfortable thing). In order to overcome them, you have to be real with yourself about what it is that makes you question things. Once you think about your insecurities, find a way to find peace with them, a way to declare victory over them. Begin your journey to overcome your insecurities, I’m beginning mine too and I promise we’re in this together.

Hello my lovely readers & Happy Self Love Sunday!
Being completely honest with you all, I’ve been feeling sad & lost. So my aunt invited me to her church for an Ignite the Night service on Thursday from 7 pm until 11 pm. I said I would come, but in my head I didn’t want to stay the whole time. But I stayed the whole time & little did either of us know that service was exactly what I needed. And I am so excited for these next upcoming Self Love Sundays!!!

I needed to be refreshed, renewed, but most importantly I needed to be encouraged. I’ve been praying without ceasing and you know I’m only human, so I felt because I wasn’t seeing immediate results that it wasn’t working. But on Thursday night, when Johnathan McReynolds took the stage to perform, he began to minister to every part of my broken spirit & soul. His praise and worship renewed me in so many ways, encouraging me to encourage myself. And today, I can say that I am doing better and feeling happy.

Being able to encourage yourself, even when it seems your life is falling apart, is all apart of self-love. Sometimes, the only person who truly understands how you feel (besides God) is you. Sometimes words are inadequate to describe your feelings to someone who isn’t going through your current emotions. And that’s why it’s pertinent that YOU encourage you. The devil is already trying to find a thousand ways to discourage you, knock you down and make you want to throw in the towel. But you have to remember who you are & whose you are.

My help comes from the Lord. My peace & joy come from the Lord. And in time, he will bless me the way he sees fit. However, it can become easy to be easily discouraged waiting for God’s perfect timing. So that’s why it’s important for you to encourage yourself during these moments. Everything is working in your favor, even if things aren’t currently going the way you please, it will all work out in the end. And that’s one of the toughest things to endure, dealing with so much & trying to remain encouraged.

How many times do you tell yourself how amazing you are? How many times do you tell yourself that you’re a conqueror? Or reaffirm your power & importance? It’s easy for you to encourage your friends, so why not do the same for yourself? You deserve encouragement from you, just as much as they do. Things may not be going your way, but these situations don’t decrease your worth or value. You are important, you are worthy, and you deserve encouragement.

Today, I challenge you to encourage yourself. What’s going on in your life that is discouraging you? Life & death lie in the power of the tongue. So it’s up to you to speak life over your situations through encouragement. I’ve started to become encouraged daily during praise and worship, talking to God and sharing my innermost feelings. I know that things will get better. How can you encourage yourself today?